Friday, October 28, 2011

It's Scary At Pencils

Leave to some genius in management to come up with the idea we should come to work dressed in Halloween costumes this weekend. As though some of the associates didn't look frightening enough (hung-over, withdrawals, etc.), now we have to come up with some half-assed attempt of pretending we're celebrating a satanic ritual to amuse our customers. I was looking around for an Adolph Hitler costume, but couldn't find one. I asked my manager Matt if he would object if I came to work tomorrow dressed as an Islamic cleric. "Please don't," he replied. So now I'm out looking for a Michael Jackson mask, or a Hannah Montana costume to wear tomorrow.


  1. Ate you gonna molest some kids dressing up as Michael Jackson ?

  2. Square Grouper,

    Your Retail Sucks website has been hit by spammers big time.

  3. I too am an inmate of Assface Depot. It's been ten years since I have experienced a day without stupidity laced insanity. People probably think you are making this up, but I am just nodding away saying "Yep".
    I recently had an interview at another company. It was not a competitor of Offarce Despot. Having been rendered an complete moron by years of monkey howling madness, I told my manager (whom I have known for 25 freaking years) of my impending interview and would inform her of the results the following day. This was more of a fishing expedition than a serious attempt to get other employment, I said.
    I must have missed the flash of red hell-glare in her eyes when she said Thanks for letting me know.
    So the interview went well but the job doesn't pay well, so I tell Her Majestic Hellbeast that I was not interested in the job.
    She then informs me that she told the district manager I was leaving and my job has been "posted for applicants". So here I sit in limbo, waiting for inventory to be over so they can fire me. And I am ok with that.