A Dark Journey Into The Bowels of America's Corporate StupidStore and Other Commentary About The Absurdity of Life In A World Going To Hell
Friday, September 30, 2011
Break Room Leaves A Bad Taste In My Mouth
There is a vending machine in the Pencils break room, and I've never seen anyone use it... that should have been my first clue. The room itself is a dark, dingy and dirty hole-in-the-wall and that should have been my second clue. Well, I found myself entering a hypoglycemic funk and made the mistake of plugging my spare change into the machine for a package of those radioactive peanut butter crackers. One bite and I had to spit the stale, nasty tasting manufactured food-like product into the trash bin. I didn't think it was possible for that sort of crap to go bad, but it had. Now, as a matter of principle I wanted to get my sixty-five cents back. I noticed Matt, my manager, pacing towards the Copy Center and I immediately got his attention by shouting, "Matt, I think I just got poisoned in the break room!" I then told him I wanted my money refunded from the vending machine because of those shitty-ass, date-expired crackers. He looked at me and said, "Why the hell did you buy anything from that machine? Tom saw a rat crawl out of it 3 months ago and we never eat anything that comes out of it." Well, I guess I should of known better.