A Dark Journey Into The Bowels of America's Corporate StupidStore and Other Commentary About The Absurdity of Life In A World Going To Hell
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Cold In A Pretzel Bowl
Tonight a customer purchased a HP Desktop that was on sale for $329. Matt, the tech manager, tried to sell him Microsoft Office, then Norton Security, then the Extended Service Plan. The customer wasn't falling for the bullshit sales rip-off, so Matt turned to me and said, "Go ring him out." As I'm at the register Mat comes over and is relentlessly going over his sales pitch, almost to the point I want to say, for the customers sake, "Shut the fuck up already with the extended service plan shit." As soon as the customer is out the door, Matt comes up to me and says, "Don't ever rush a customer through check-out when I'm trying to make a sale." Now I'm wondering if this guy is for real. He then asks me, "Do you know what a market basket is?" I want to respond, "Do you know what a fuckin' asshole is?", but answer, "Sir, yes sir!" Matt then says, "Your market basket was $6.99 for the pretzels the guy bought along with the computer." Later, while Matt is spending 30 minutes in the crapper, I'm able to convince a customer not to buy the Toshiba laptop on display but go purchase a MacBook at The Apple Store instead.